Today I returned home in SL. To be totally honest, I cannot quite remember how long had it been since the last time I had been there. For the last couple of months I’ve been passing most of my time in-world at Ephemeria – which no longer exists as I built it.
Life has its own timings, I guess. In a way, it is curious that the same day I signed a new rental in FL, I also receive a note from my SL landlord saying I was delayed in paying the tiers, which I had totally forgotten to do. It’s great that at ACS theya re very organized, that way I could simply remove my things and abandon the land.
Anyway, I couldn’t help finding it a bit odd that I was writing dismissal letters both in FL and in SL. With a mixed feeling of sorrow and hope I became conscious that I am moving on and choosing my path, which I expect will be healthier and happier than this last stage of my life.
In SL, I am obviously keeping my home and land in 100Limite and have no intentions of letting it go. At ground level, I might have my neighbours complaining about my sometimes odd tastes in landscaping and building, but there’s where I will now set up the scenarios for my pictures.
In FL, I am finally going back to a proper appartment, after a year and half in a temporary location which was my refuge from a world that I sensed as a threat but actually looks more like a bunker than like a home, lol. My future bedroom will have TWO windows, and oh boy for someone who hasn’t seen much of the day light at home this is a luxury!
But in a way, I am sorry to leave from there. My current landlord is the mother of a dear friend whom I first met in-world. They were a huge help and probably saved my life… and I mean it literally. They gave me a place to hide when my whole life came apart and my fears overwhelmed my senses.
It’s time to move on, however. Now that I finally accepted that my ex-partner is dishonest enough to want me to pay half the house while he asks the court to grant him the whole place with no reimboursement to me, I had to face the fact that I totally misjudged him and for eight years was able to love him and his daughters dearly. I guess that we all make those kinds of mistakes, once in a while in our lives. In a way, I pity him for not being able to support himself and his family and for having to take advantage of other people in order to fulfil his basic needs.
Me, on the other hand, I am on my feet again, in spite of his attempts to bring me down. I am being helped to trust myself again, and I was lucky enough to find this amazing guy who has been standing by my side in so many dark moments, supporting me in every possible way.
Bah, I didn’t intend o write such a long post lol. I belive I needed to landmark the moment, that’s all. I have my head full of images of my new place now and yeah, some of them are a bit… different, let’s say hehehe. In time and with a lil help I will be able to set it up the way I would like it to be. We shall see. Yesterday, I was smiling just before I fell asleep… you know the feeling when you’re coming back home ?
Summer's Way 