One of my recent posts had a really nice comment where Peter Stindberg summed up his conceipt of Second Life. Today, a friend asked in Facebook whether people would still be around if all the games disappeared from that platform. In both cases, opinions highlighted the fact that these were mostly a mean for people to meet other people and keep in touch with each other.
Well, to start with, I might just agree with all of them. No doubt, my first years in Second Life were of discovery of others. Other people, coming from other countries, with different experiences and skills. It was a ride, indeed. A vertiginous one, no doubt.
Then, I had some unfortunate experiences with groups – some experts on human behaviour call them tribes. That was most disappointing and even disturbing. As time went by, I noticed that I had developped a standard behaviour of leaving any community where I felt I was slipping in. I fell apart from any groups of my own nationality, then I droped from Plurk and recently I have been quieter and quieter in Facebook.
Not to mention Second Life. Where I found myself choosing isolation more and more often. I gave up attending any of the said “social events”, well, except for concerts – there, I feel totally anonymous and I do not have to speak to anyone if I do not feel like it.
I still enjoy a good one-to-one chit chat or deep conversations with a few people with whom I remain connected. But for the most part ? Well, I admit that I prevented a lot of people from even noticing if I am online or not. In fact, one of the things I really don’t like in Second Life is that someone who IMs you immediately finds out whether you are online or not. And then, the only option is replying back, or the interlocutor may think you are rude – and those who knock on my door these days, all of them are people I really respect, trust, and whose friendship is important to me. But at times, I really wish there was a way I could get back to them on a later moment, as in Flickr, or even Facebook. In these, we are able to show ourselves up whenever we feel like it… if not, we can simply loggin and out without a trace.
Now, you may think this serioulsy spoils my Second Life experience. Well, it honestly does not. Quite the contrary, I believe. I am able to do all the things I enjoy. I attend all the exhibitions I have an interest for… just not only during the premiere. I visit all the sims I am curious about… just not only when there’s any major event going on. I communicate with everyone that matters to me… just not only during parties, contests or any other sort of gathering that implies more than 3 people together at the same time on the same place.
I am well aware that for most of you out there join any of the so called social networks (and let’s face it, this is how Second Life is perceived my the majority) as a mean to stay in touch. I often wonder why the heck do I keep joining so many platforms where people are expected to participate actively, if I already know that I will only post and read what interests me… I do not intend to have loads of contacts, I do not aim at being popular or even accepted. All I want… well, I guess that’s still what I wanted at the beginning of this journey, only I did not know how to do it. I want to understand the human behaviour and the reasons that make people act the way they do. I wish to challenge myself and shoot the best pictures that I can or set-up the most beautiful landscapes my skills allow me to. I enjoy jumping from SL to FB to Flickr and AU in order to appreciate the different initiatives and work. I have a great pleasure in commenting anything that draws my attention and to share with others the works of art that unveil before my eyes. However, it is important that I am able to do that on my own timing, according to my own convenience… and humour. Why? Because I learn faster and deeper if I am not involved in group activities. I am more objective and I am less able to jump into fast conclusions if I am not a member of the crew. My balance is better kept if I keep my independent path.
To a point that whenever I come across a stranger I tend to fly away really fast, just to avoid that person to feel tempted to speak to me. Simply because, most of the time, I really don’t feel the need to speak to nobody. Now, do you want to know the most curious thing? There are others like me around there!
So now you know. If you spot me, and the next minute I am not there, if you invite me over to your event and I do not attend, well… it is only because me and groups is not a pleasant combination. It does not mean, however, that I am not paying attention or that I am absent. For I am neither. I am just… following the path I chose for myself, alone in the metaverse.
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